Thursday, March 31

bilog ang buwan

i have not checked kung full moon ngayon. i've been attacked by extreme pagka-ungas today, i don't know why. minsan, it is refreshing to find yourself doing silly antics as if you're a mischievous six-year-old. kahit parang retard ka na, it makes you feel good naman. why not, nakakapagod din to be mature and serious in life ano? even though i don't pride myself to be really serious, there are moments that i have to exude authority in some situations, otherwise, mawawalan ako ng trabaho.

anyway, it may be brought by the fact that it's seldom i go with Mom to get the groceries. this is one bonding time i truly enjoy kasi i have limitless chances of being silly. at 23, i still feel happy revving the grocery cart, using my tummy as leverage on the cart handle, raising my feet from the ground and zwing! hanggang sa end na yun ng aisle. sarap nun ha, kahit naka-office clothes. haha, baliw.

this evening, i found myself being so crazy, with stupid questions i meant to get relevant answers to. aside from the regular grocery, we're also shopping for stuff for my uncle's birthday tomorrow. so parang maid lang ako ni mommy na sunod ng sunod kung sansan sya pumupunta. Mabuti na lang talaga, my Mom has sense of humor, too. My stupid ramblings were:

"Mommy, pwede bang lagyan ng buko yung macaroni salad?"

"(arranging the Chuckies in tetra packs alongside Nestle Creams in tetra packs too) Ano kaya kung etong Nestle cream ang nalagyan mo ng straw at nainom mo ano? Ang kapal nun sa lalamunan!"

"Mommy, ano kaya kung sa birthday ko maghanda na lang ako ng maraming maraming Clover chips?"

"Ang sexy ng Safeguard, ano?"

"(whispering) Mommy, tingnan mo, si Sister (a nun), may napkin at diaper sa cart!"

"(in the meat section) Mommy, kilala mo ba yung manok ni Noynoy (Aquino)? Yung kinatay kaya hindi na sya kumakain ng manok ngayon? At least si Andy (my cousin), since birth never na talaga kumain ng chicken!"

"(the Mangan waiter received the money from mom) I received five hundred pesos, Ma'am." I said "Ay hinde, one thousand yan ha (Mom pinches my leg)!"

"(looking closely at the silverware) Mommy, ganito yung tinidor ko sa office, walang kapartner, iuwi ko kaya ito (Mom pinches me again sabay sabing, "Kumain ka na lang, pwede?")?"

you know what's really the nicest about this whole thing? the way i see that my mom grins as she turns her head away from me, even if she smirks as she shows that she's so embarrassed of what i'm doing. talaga, nakakatuwa yun. dramatic ramblings aside, i know konti na lang yung natitirang time na medyo may license pa ako na mag-inarte na parang bata pa rin. i feel that she kinda fears that time na i will go on my own and will refuse to take things as lightly as i take them now. alam ko she still appreciates the moments na ako pa rin yung super buddy buddy nya na puro kalokohan lang ang ginagawa. it does not necessarily have to end as long as we're both alive, pero admittedly, dadating yung time na things will not be the same di ba? maybe i'm also savoring each moment. maybe i'm also afraid.

pero iba talaga magpaka-lukaret kanina. it's so therapeutic, parang yung pag-iyak sa gabi kahit walang dahilan. huwuhoo.

before we left the mall, i asked my mom to buy me happy feet sandals, sabay turo sa glass display. you know what she told me?

"Hay naku gabi na, lonely feet na lang ang tinitinda ngayon!"

Comments? Here na lang.

Tuesday, March 29


My good friends Tammy and Patty forwarded this to me on Holy Wednesday. At first read, this is nothing new. It has been common knowledge that "keep cool" is probably not in media person Korina Sanchez's dictionary. I recently traveled and found the same thing happening to me, but on a different airline. What made it different was how nature, obviously something beyond anybody's control, interfering. So kahit nanggigitata ka na dahil wala kang damit, wala kang masisisi ng tuluyan kasi ginawa naman lahat para maihabol yung bagahe mo.

I believe this e-mail made the rounds in different yahoo groups and I would like to share it as it was forwarded to me. I would advise to read until the end of my post and not just after this letter.

"ken estrella"
Date: Tue, 22 Mar 2005 00:06:59 +0000 (GMT)

I would like to share with you an incident that happened when Ms.Korina Sanchez flew to Las Vegas on March 17( last week.) When Korina arrived in Las Vegas, she was fuming mad because hersuitcase did not arrive with her on that flight. These tincidentshappen when you fly on any airline. She was screaming "FUCK YOU" tothe arrival agents blaming that her bag didn't arrive. The Las Vegasstaff told her that they were going to make an investigation as to whyher bags were lost. Korina demanded that if her bag is found, to sendit via Federal Express immediately....which is not a problem for theairline. But Federal Express cannot deliver it to her in 3 days.The airline found the bag which was left behind in Manila. The airlinesaid they will deliver it in 24 hours. Better than what FEDEX is offering.

On her way back to Manila, her flight was delayed by 1 hour and 20minutes. again, upon advising Korina of the new departure time, sheagain flared up and again said "FUCK YOU" to the check in agents inLas Vegas. Korina should never do that. She might have forgotten that she's inthe US. She can be sued by the people of America for her foullanguage. Wherever she maybe, be it in the US, the Middle East,Europe, Asia, or even in the smallest town of the Republic of thePhilippines, she should treat people with respect!

This is not the first time this type of arrogance from her wasreceived by the airline people. I know a lot of airline staff, andthey said that this is not the first time they had this experiencewith her. Anytime she travels, she's always in a bitchy mood!

It seems that FUCK YOU are the favorite words of Korina. She, being aPUBLIC media personality, should set a good example to her colleagues.Screaming FUCK YOU in public is not a good gesture from a publicfigure. I believe ABS-CBN should reprimand Korina for her rudeness andarrogance. ABSCBN definitely knows Korina's attitude towards other people, but up to now has done nothing with it. SHe may be sweetiesweetie on screen, but the truth is she is a WITCH in person.


Grabe 'no?

As expected, as soon as Ms. Sanchez went onboard her radio show with Ted Failon, she aired her side. She completely denied the cussing part. Well, at least, the words used.

I can't detail here what Korina Sanchez said but as of the present, the management of PAL daw issued a letter of apology to her and promised to look into the matter. That's good. I honestly don't believe that they sincerely mean it; they made that because they know that Ms. Sanchez will never stop, and it's so bad for business.

However, my friend called me last Monday and he happened to be there when Korina was, let's say, throwing a fit.

The convo went something like this:

"O, balita ko nagwawala daw si Korina dyan sa airport."

"Eh sino ba naman ang hindi magwawala dun..."

"Ano ba nangyari?"

It turned out that her bag got lost and was left in Manila. It was not the usual case of being left behind. Pati daw yung tag sa bag, wala na, so, maiiwan nga yun. What's odd was how the tag was removed from the bag. It's true what Tammy said na you can flip and throw bags pero mahirap matanggal yung tag sa bag unless someone had a hand in doing it..either pupunitin or guguntingin. Kung ganun man nangyari (flipping and throwing, as what happens when loading the bags), mahihiwalay lang yun dun sa ibang bags mo. Anyway, so namuti na raw ang mata ni Korina kakahintay wala yung bag nya, initially ruling theft, o baka nadampot ng iba. And as my title goes, it was a Louis Vuitton, identical to the bag that arrived with her.

Now, I cannot confirm the truth of this, but when she asked daw the PAL personnel if they do not check, sinabihan daw sya ng "No" sabay talikod. And that infuriated her finally.

"So, nagmura tlaga?"

"Oo naman...sabi nya...(imitating Korina's voice) "P**ang-*na!P**ang-****naaa!"

She was cussing daw because of what happened and not towards anybody. Eh sampu sangpera lang siguro ang expression na yun sa circle nila. Ako nga pag aburido sa trabaho at may biglang mahuhulog, napapasigaw ako ng "P**a!", kaya tuloy papatigilin muna ako ng boss ko kasi akala nya galit na ako.

Ang siste pa daw, when Korina received her bag, slashed na daw from end to end. Well, ang alam ko kasi when any baggage goes through inspection, it happens. Pero hindi naman yung ganung super sira na. Minsan nga stupid yung magpapasecure ng locks sa bag mo pero minsan makikita mo na lang na na-hammer yung lock kasi may gusto silang i-inspect at hindi nila nabuksan. I was told nga na baggage inspectors do slash a small part of your bag pag hopeless case na and they can't open the bag...but the slit is large enough to insert a hand to check what's inside. So, I dunno what happened really pero siguro na-slash yun ng konti for inspection tapos nung nakita nung mga taga-PAL, sabi siguro..."Ah ganun ha, nagmumumura ka sa counter namin sa Vegas ha, puwes, warakin yan!" Hahahahaha!!!

Anyway, the part in the e-mail where you should respect everybody is true. Minsan, it's hard to draw that line between being assertive and feisty from being rude and disrespectful. People in power find themselves victimized by this dilemma more often. Kahit sa airport pa yan o sa sariling bahay. So if we take the e-mail as the truth, it validates Korina's rudeness sa ibang tao. I can't speak about it dahil wala pa akong first-hand experience doon. By the way, in her own radio program, she admitted na sinabi nya sa PAL people (about her left behind baggage):

"Sabihin mo kay Lucio Tan, sa dami ng kayamanan nya, makakabili sya ng flying carpet. Kung kailangan niyong i-flying carpet ang bag ko, gawin nyo! Kailangan nyong i-FedEX yang bag ko. Gusto ko, bukas na bukas din paggising ko,nasa pintuan ko na ang bag ko!"


However, one point I don't find agreeable nga lang is the perpetual convenient excuse na "it happens on every airline". Ang labo talaga. Parang tanggapin na lang na ganyan kasi lagi namang nangyayari yan eh.

On the other hand, given this circumstance, and given na yung version ni Korina ang totoo, unfair naman na she's always the aggressor in every story. Parang because of her image, siya palagi ang nang-api, without even sticking to the facts. Siguro part din ng paggalang sa lahat ng tao yung i-accept na merong mas maikli ang pasensya kesa sa atin. Sabi nga, she also had people to attest na hindi sya nagfafa-fuck you doon, even congressmen. Na narinig din nung kaibigan ko nung hinarap ni Korina at sinabing:

"You know what, I'm not a politician! I'm a commentator! So I can say whatever I want"

Even if we don't like a person or not, it's unfair to deny that person the chance to explain what really happened. Ako nga, for some reason, hindi ko talaga ma-take si Jamby Madrigal (eh kasi pakiramdam ko lang naman, she has the hots for Mar Roxas! Hahahahaha!) o kay Loi Ejercito, o dun kay Homobono Adaza sa sobrang sawsaw suka, pero kung sa kanila nangyari yun, dapat pa ring pakinggan yung version naman nila ng nangyari and I would find it unfair kung may magpapakalat ng rumor na hindi naman nila ginawa.

Ang moral sa akin ng incident na ito ay dalawa. First, wag ng bumili ng Louis Vuitton na bag. Prone ka sa argumento at madaling malaslas from end to end. Second, bilib ako ako kay Mar Roxas. As in. Whew.

Thanks to Kryzzy for the Korina quotes.

Comments? Here na lang.

Friday, March 25

not so bored

nothing much has changed today apart from the fact that i was not so bored as yesterday. i finally finished girls in pants, the third (and last?) book of ann brashares in the traveling pants series. i am so hooked, grabe. i never thought i would return to the teeny bopper genre after almost a decade ago of my sweet valley days. it feels good having to reconnect with the teen in me (not that i'm so old!). i guess i never had much of it after highschool that i missed the feeling. i don't know, i'm not sure. the movie version of the first book is due on june this year and i can't wait to see it. at promise, sa movie house ko sya papanoorin. pero di ako makapromise na hindi ako bibili ng pirated copy after!

i finished two mini-stories which are for a few good friends only so i won't dwell much about it here.

oh, i have an optical mouse na nga pala but i am so stupid i can't figure out how to set it in a scroll mode that can allow me to use it like the way i use my mouse in the office. i will just holler for help when i can't figure it out yet in the manual. grabe, i really feel ang stupid ko.

i am starting leo tolstoy's anna karenina today. that is after i started a few pages of judith mcnaught's almost heaven (maybe too mushy at the moment), then shifted to sophie's world (light but too informative--i'll just be disappointed not digesting what was written). i am not yet on the book itself, what with all these endless forewords and repetitive details about leo tolstoy's life. goodluck to me. it's 785 pages of hopefully, a good read.

Thursday, March 24


this is nothing new to me but funny that i still feel strange everytime it dawns upon me.

have you ever been bored to death? that of all the pleasure tools (yeah baby, tools) around you, you still feel sooo lost thinking of what to do? i wonder what insanity concern this falls under.

i've always complained i need more time to do some things. now that it's here, i won't move a muscle. if you call this my warm up period, then i would be all geared up around sunday afternoon, rendering the effort useless because monday is back to work hell day. i guess i should only be telling this to myself.

i spent the first day of my four-day break going through a small box of books that my sister's mom sent me. i sorted them by author then by my level of interest. as always the case, the most number were written by danielle steel and even though i have nothing against her writing and her glamour back cover shots, i read only like 4 or 5 of her books in my lifetime. to date, i have around 35 of her novels. if i'll be stranded in an island with all her books in tow, i might give them a shot. or i could ignore it while this extreme case of ennui sets in, for reasons i do not know at all.

after that, i took a shower and watched notting hill hoping to feel that tingle in my stomach also known as, yeah, kilig. i slightly felt it but they vanished when joy called me. i then spent two hours listening to what happened yesterday in the office (her gracious attempt to fill me in), butting in a few times, while eating chocolate bars (yes, plural) and clipping my nails in between. she had an incoming call who i assume is her boyfriend so i prepared myself to install the computer mouse that lai gave me (yes lai, finally) and be on a roll typing my promise to my friends. until i remembered that it was the gilmore girls marathon in studio 23. eleven episodes in 9 long hours. i turned on the tv and let 9 hours pass by just like that. i did occasional naps in between but i mostly caught a great chunk of the run.

after the marathon and feeling like a zombie, i ate dinner, soundtripped for a while then go online.

it must have been a picture of a rest day but i am still so so so bored. it overwhelmes me that the idea of sitting in front of the computer typing occasionally then staring at it for about three minutes before typing again is deemed normal.

Wednesday, March 23


i went home earlier than usual. absent pa nga ako sa class ko di ba? but i feel so bratty tonight i want to mess up with everything that's in order inside the house. just for kicks ba. hmph.

and this is because of a very trivial matter. pero i simply cannot control my anger streaks and yes, i will admit, hands down, that i have no chance of getting over it soon to display any form of maturity.

for some reason beyond my control and because of freakin' jologs attitude of people, i cannot watch the show i want because of a cheap soap opera. every stupid tv in the house is used to watch cheap shows and jologs B movies in dvd. at ako? iilang palabas na lang ang pinapanood ko regularly sa isang linggo, anak ng kamote naman o. pati sa sariling kuwarto ng may kuwarto kailangang pairalin ang pagiging hospitable tsaka "minsan lang naman" mentality. ah lintek. baduy kayong lahat!

sige, magbwisitan tayo ngayon. wala lang tlaga ako mapag-vent-an ng inis ko eh. hindi sya naubos nung nagkalat ako at sinuway lahat ng mga hindi dapat galawin dito sa bahay. ganyan ako kasalbahe pag naiinis.

i know this is not how a 23-year old should act. eh ano ba, kung gusto ko magpaka-12 years old habang buhay, wala kayong pakialam!

mag-o-opposite's night ako ngayon. sana napanood nyo yung episode ng spongebob squarepants para malaman nyo ibig kong sabihin.

nakakabwisit tlaga. ako pa ang nag-a-adjust sa sarili kong bahay.
kalihim at mga pawalang kuwentang kuwento habang humahaba

ayoko pala maging secretary. to think na yung course ko daw eh para maging isang "glorified secretary". to think na nung naghahanap ako ng unang trabaho sabi ko i would like to be a secretary first before eyeing a thorny climb sa corporate ladder. no offense meant to secretaries whose job is exciting and sensitive and for some, noble.

our unit secretary has been sick for two days and i do not know where it was written na ako ang papalit sa kanya kapag wala sya. hay naku. mabuti na lang nagpapa-late ako pagpunta dun kasi ayoko ng nagoorder ng starbucks at nagdidistribute ng mga kape sa umaga. worse, ayoko ng nag-ooperate ng percolator with matching hugas sa hapon. sabi ko nga, ma-pride ako eh. you know..."prideful". muwahahahaha!!!

so namiss ko ang desk ko ng dalawang araw. pahapyaw lang akong nakagawa nung mga trabaho ko tlaga dahil naging operator ako ng buong unit with matching pagsisinungaling na wala dun ang unit chief. well, hindi naman pagsisinungaling yun kasi yung boss namin may nakasabit sa "mobile chief" sa kuwelyo nya kasi di sya mapakali sa opisina nya. minsang titigil doon, eh para makipag-close door meeting lang. tapos lalarga na ulit. pero okay sya kasi hindi mautos and hindi pasaway. pag sinabi mong meeting na, stand na sya sa unglamorous nyang swivel chair. pag sinabi mong sya na lang ang hinihintay sa conference call, madali syang sumunod. ayoko pa naman ng paulit-ulit akong nagreremind.

at dahil sa security drama dito sa office, ang secretary din ang taga-sundo sa pintuan ng mga walang access o hindi regular employees. eh ang dami noon no, labas-masok pa. pag nakikita ko ng galing sa ext **** yung incoming call, bumubulong ako na sana eh may makasabay na empleyado para hindi ko na sunduin sa pintuan. minsan pag me ganun sinasabi kong:

1. O, lalabas si Tatay (Unit chief), paglabas nya, pumasok ka na; o
2. Papunta ata dito si CG (consul general), pag papasok na, sabihin mo isabay ka.

at least, may ginawa akong paraan di ba.

okay naman yung change in environment pero sa totoo lang kuntento na ako sa maliit kong mundo dito sa communications team namin. kahit pa sabihing sa lugar na ito ng secretary nandoon ang action, minsan wala akong pakialam. eh iinit lang ang ulo mo pag may arogante. tapos wala namang mababawas sa pagkatao mo pag meron kang namiss na nagwalang aplikante pagkatapos madeny o artistang nainterview na hindi naman pala maganda sa personal.

speaking of action, i read somewhere that this person threw a fit sa isang airport. hindi si loi, wala akong paki sa kanya, pero i have to admit rude naman yung ganung ginawa sa kanya. kung napagkamalan pa syang doppelganger ni madam auring baka sabihin kong pagpasensyahan na lang. anyway, nasabi ko sa isang forum na yung nasulat na ginawa na yun nung isang personality eh parang di ako naniniwala kasi nung andito naman sya, when she learned na di pwede pagbigyan yung gusto nya eh pumayag naman (at kahit naman hindi sya pumayag, can she do anything?no. kahit maglupasay sya dyan). sumusunod sa batas, ika nga. pero merong taong hindi marunong talaga. kasi kanina, this bleep bleep columnist from PS na si PT...aroganteng walanghiya. kung pwede lang mag-deny ng visa based sa ugali, dapat ineligible na yan for life. bastos. ang yabang! eh katunog naman ng ****** sa ingles ang apelyido. akala mo kung sino. grr!!!!

so harinawa at tapos na naman ang aking stint sa pagiging secretary dahil tiyak namang magaling na ang secretary namin sa monday. babalik na ako sa dati kong mundo. though admittedly mas okay mag-surf doon sa pwestong yun.hihihihi!!!

minsan may bouts of "I-want-to-resign" ang aking emotional muscles. minsan naman i'm thinking na okay na muna ito for the time being. mahal ko na yung ibang kasama ko. yung iba lang. yung iba kahit harmonious co-existence lang, okay na ako. yung mga scenariong nagmimeeting yung isang team na akala mo nagkakasayahan lang sila yun pala madedethrone na ang militant groups sa pagpoprotesta...lahat naman may ganun di ba? akalain nyo bang tinanong ko pa kung "are they having a meeting o are they fighting?" tapos marie answered, "both!" pala totoo nga. hehe. pag nalaman yan ng kinauukulan sa lunes bah, hindi ako nagsabi nun ha. una, she does not read my blog...she doesn't even know i have a blog. pangalawa, labas ako dyan. naghuhugas na ako ng kamay kasi baka mamya magturuan na naman yan naku ha. bastos ako pag inaakusahan ng mali, ireremind ko lang kayo.

so dapat pala mangilin na ngayon ano? darn, plan ko pa naman eh mag-DVD marathon, tapusin ang apat na libro at mag-ayos ng kuwarto sa susunod na apat na araw na bakasyon. at magpaplano pala nung ilocos trip na kailangan matuloy kasi nag-pass na si sandy sa baguio trip nila ni miggy to prepare for this trip. isang mahabang buntong-hininga. hindi ako papasok ngayon for the second straight time, sa aking spanish class. delinquency 101, grabe. nag-aayang magkape si rayan sa makati. ang gusto ni wency para sa role ni robert langdon eh si george clooney, sa role ni teabing eh si patrick stewart...sabi ko naman gusto ko si ralph o kahit si joseph fiennes sa langdon role at si anthony hopkins sa role ni teabing. nareceive na ni kace yung gift ko sa kanya sabi ng fedex sa lunes pa raw. wala pa rin daw sa haus si sally. hindi ko pa nasesend yung pics kay lyndsey. madali pala masira yung memory card ng cam ko kaya hindi na narecover yung pics nung party ni erielle...kaya naman pala free lang eh. at mahal pala ang memory card, tsk.

at okay yung Nina Live! na album, astig ha. sulit ang P280. pero gusto ko pa rin yung original ng love moves in mysterious ways kahit maayos naman ang pagkaka-sing ni nina. maraming remakes lately ang mas gusto ko pa rin yung original. meron kasing remakes naman na okay lang ang feeling mo sa parehong rendition. ang mga hindi ako comfortable pakinggan (PERO HINDI KO SINASABING PANGIT), eh yung how do you heal a broken heart ng kung sino man yun, yung if the feeling is gone ni kyla, at yung now that you're gone nung hindi ko rin alam, basta kinakanta sya sa hiram ata o sa save the last dance for me.

uuwi na ako.

Friday, March 18


i just have to say this, when the adrenaline rush is still at its peak.

two hours after my employee evaluation was signed and i was counseled on improving my supervisory skills, my team was busted for leaving the office empty for five minutes. according to our filipino supervisor, our american supervisor was mad because she was calling the unit at 1:05 pm and no one was there. 1:05. i would say it again-- 1:05.

true, we got back at around 1:08 pm and it's because we went out and it rained hard so naturally the walking speed was affected. by the way, we went to an ukay-ukay. it was our lunch break, for george's sake. since i was in-charge today and with the command responsibility chuva above my head, i had to take all the cudgels for it. wah, there's always a first time for everything.

and at 1:30, we reached a solid pre-"american supervisor is mad" scenario and it was so annoying. inis. basta it turned out na the american supervisor is not as mad as claimed. man, she wasn't even mad at all because kulang na lang magkilitian kami nung dinala ko yung controversial file na allegedly eh kailangang kailangan niya. hay naku.

and i hope i won't be busted pero i decided not to attend my spanish class tonight. at first kasi may basketbnall game ang officemates namin sa seafront and it was the deputy chief herself who coaxed us to go. eh raining cats and dogs ang drama ng weather at open court pala yun so it was postponed. alam nyo naman ako pag nacondition ko na ang mind ko, di na ako magbabago. so hindi ako papasok. ha-ha.

Thursday, March 17

anything but banana leaf 2

this week is so fast ha. tita beth is absent today, i hope she gets well tomorrow...i might not last being in-charge, hahahaha!!! pero i'm coping...we're coping. i'm not the dictatorial type of leader naman, and so is tita beth, pero syempre yung level ng respect kay tita beth mas mataas, hehe. and with me, they can do whatever they want basta they deliver the goods. i know it's not good in the long run, with all the "you have to be in control" managerial crap dito ngayon, pero it may just be a glimpse of the kind of leader that i will be-- in case i decide to take the plunge in december. i told eiselle that if i am asked as of this moment, i would definitely say no. but anything can happen. yung ibang mga bagay na akala ko hindi ko kaya, it turned out capable pala akong gawin. bukod lang doon sa glitch ng perpetual climb and grade increases, personal conviction and emotional preparation lang ang pinakakailangan ko. pero teka, maaga pa para jan. anong petsa pa lang. hihihihi.

my spanish classes are going smoothly pero don't expect me to start conversing in spanish; mas okay ako sa reading. ewan ko ba.

anyway, this is titled anything but banana leaf kasi my friends discovered my aversion for banana leaf curry house. hindi naman as a whole and wala naman akong unfortunate incident doon...kaya lang yung branch nila across our office closed kasi di masyadong patok eh. as for me, hindi ko lang trip yung malaysian at thai cuisines eh. basta. kaya ayun, last saturday, when they asked me kung saan, sabi ko anywhere wag lang dun (so mali pala yung title ko no--well, pede na rin, tipong, "i would eat anything but banana leaf's food, pwede na yun).

here are some other pics na hindi tlaga ako nahihiyang i-share,hahahaha!!!

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during dinner, si lynds, ciara and tzai na parang ghost

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si ciara deadma talaga, basta kakain lang siya habang lumalabas ang deepest hidden urge ni lynds na i-subject sa torture si tzai

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ciara and tzai. kunwari serious.

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lynds and me. hulaan nyo kung ano nasa isip ni neds.

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believe it or not, sa restroom ito. whores. hihihi.

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em and neds. random talk.

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me and ciara while killing time in a coffee shop. ang halay naman, parang may hidden desire ako kay ciara. yuckers.

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ang mga nakapink. uso ba tlaga?

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whoring pa rin.

i've never frequented greenbelt on saturday nights. i go there pero i hardly notice people the way i did last saturday. in truth, wala namang masama magporma di ba, tsaka you really have to at least dress presentably pag lalabas ka at yung pupuntahan mo eh crowded din. kaya lang, yung presentable at comfort eh subjective. minsan naman dinedeny na lang tlaga. sa dinami dami ng tao that particular night, most of what i saw eh parang nakikiuso lang kahit hirap na hirap na lumakad. ewan ko ba. kami namang 6, we're simply in jeans and blouses, okay naman. hindi naman sa i didn't feel i was them na sa tingin ko eh hindi bagay doon. imagine naman, magkakape ka lang o magce-crepe para ka pang pupunta sa fashion show. kada sip ng kape at kada subo ng crepe, kelangan mag-retouch. hay naku.

ang aliw pa, i saw people there na as far back as high school grad ko pa ata huling nakita. maliit lang tlaga ang mundo :) . pero masarap din naman yun, paminsan-minsan, you look back kasi that's the only way lang to see how far you've gone. it's worth smiling about, knowing where your friends are now. kahit yung iba parang hindi na nakakaalala, okay pa din to know, at the very least, na buhay pa pala sila.

i hope that a few years from now, i can still look back and smile like this. after all, i have more people, places, things and events to remember.

tulad nito:

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my boss and i having a moment nung nagtreat si sandy in this new seafood resto along UN avenue. namaster ko na ang art ng kunyaring nakikinig. hahaha, joke lang po!

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valentine's date namin ni mommy. kaya siguro ako na-lure kumain doon eh may plan pala to humiliate me kasi kakulay ng damit ko yung tablecloth. gah.

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nakabackpack ako ng ganyan sa airport sa minneapolis. wala lang. kasi slingback bag yan na laman yung mga books na nabili ko sa borders. may nabili din akong singing tigger na ayoko isiksik sa maleta kaya ayan...para hindi madeform, nilabas ko yung ulo. ingenuity ang tawag dyan. hahahaha!!! kaya walang naniniwala sa purpose ng trip ko eh.

hay. i wish ganito lang lagi.

Tuesday, March 15

anything but banana leaf

even if susan said that today is like the longest day of her life, ako naman feeling ko lately ang bilis bilis ng mga araw. ang bilis magweekend, ang bilis din matapos. wish ko lang talaga mas productive yung every day ko 'no...i don't bother to quantify what i do anymore, lalo lang nakakfrustrate pag nakitang mong laging below par ang mga natatapos mo.

anyway, last saturday, finally nagmeet ulit kami nina em, lynds, neds and tzai. well, si lizette lang kulang to complete the group. eh as always missing in action naman yun lagi. this time, meron daw dinner yung bagong team nya sa philam. okay. i just hope makasama sya next time. i was happy to be with them coz it's been, what, almost eight years nung nagkahiwalay tlaga kami?

so syempre kahit medyo i waited sa powerbooks, okay lang, sa cavite pa naman sila galing. twas late na when i learned na andun na rin pala si tzai with ciara. anyway, nasa bookstore naman ako, alam nyo naman how disoriented i become pag nasa ganung shop ako. kahit nga wala ng labasan eh. may sale pa sila ng books. it was raining cheap chicklits, pero i controlled my urge to buy, strict ang budget ko tsaka malakas ang feeling ko na makakantyawan ako na magtreat at tumama nga ang hinala ko no. :) so i bought only one and plan ko is to read it before watching the woodsman. check nyo na lang sa amazon pareho and you will understand bakit type ko sila pagsunurin. the title of the book is when kambia elaine flew in from neptune. napansin ko din, grabe ang discworld series/ terry pratchett books ngayon! at yung related discworld books, they like combined it in one book, one big book, with three stories each, and they were called "the discworld omnibus". astig. whew. kaso what do you expect from thick, hardbound books? correct, mahal sya. at after elfriede jelinek, i am firm na gusto ko tlaga ma-try basahin si haruki murakami! i browsed norwegian wood when i was in powerbooks ATC last year. then yung katabi kong guy sa plane to DC, he was reading sputnik sweetheart. at nakita ko mukhang complete naman sya sa powerbooks so i might go for it. kahit one lang, alam nyo naman ako.

so ang meeting na 3;30 pm at the most naging mga 4;30 na. okay lang, pinoy kami lahat, why bother to adjust? hehe. yun, konting asaran, tapos nagtuturuan kung saan pupunta (which is always the case), challenge kung pano ipronounce yung name ng restos, pagdeadma kay em kahit nagrereklamo sya na nakabukas na lahat ng pores nya kasi mainit...then finally nakadecide na magbwelo muna bago magdinner. we had crepes at cafe breton and of course dun na nag-take off ang pinakamasayang topic of conversation: former classmates and what has happened to them. super happy ako kahit ako nagbayad, hahahahaha! minsan ko lang naman makita mga etucap friends ko. :)

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si tzai, neds, em and me. aww, si lynds at si ciara wala. see, naghot pink pa kami pareho ni em.

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kami ni em. mukhang hiyang naman sya sa pagiging FA. sana mag-international flights na sya, para maiba na din yung scarves na nilalagay nya kay shakes. laki ng mukha ko, man.

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em, me and lynds. hot pink at black.

then of all places, bakit ba namin naisip na dun sa basement tiangge ng greenbelt pumunta. wala lang, we idled an hour going round and round the small basement na wala namang nabili. just when we decided where to have dinner, hassle naman yung place, either reserved o mainit kasi yung tables na lang sa labas ang pwede, or closed pa. gumuho ang mga pag-asang masusunod ang gusto naming lahat. hay. so yun, we went back upstairs and settled for bubba gump. it was my first time there.

eto, since hindi tlaga first choice yung place, one decade bago maka-order ng food. eto ang version namin nun nina em and neds.

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sige lang, smile smile lang, we do not know yet na we'll have a hard time choosing what to eat.

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si neds syempre di pa sya makadecide kung titingin ba sya sa menu. si em nasa "active scrutiny mode" pa. ako...well, kunyari engrossed sa menu pero may katext ako nyan.

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sige, hanap pa. basa pa. tipong memorized na yung nakasulat. yung items daw na madalas mong balikan kahit as a whole e undecided ka, yun daw ang gusto mo tlaga. kay em, yung lt. dan something something, paulit ulit sya. ako yung salmon with veggies. pero ang ending, hindi yun ang inorder namin. galeng no?

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eto tapos na. okay naman yang appetizer na yan, those were chicken strips i think..and it's cajun-spiced, something that tzai and i have decided to avoid pero wa choice type nung iba eh.

bitin ba? sa ibang gabi na lang. am so sleepy na tlaga. bukas naman busy as a queen bee na naman ako. more pics sa next post. pati review ko wala pa. hay.

Saturday, March 12

soy asi que feliz no puedo parar el sonreir

hmm. my desperate attempt to apply what i learned from profesor felipe. anyway, i discovered that i am a better reader than speaker. in this foreign language, at least. i noticed that i can get all paper exercises correctly, i can even read a few pages written in spanish but i get baffled when i am asked to construct a sentence or someone strikes a conversation with me using the language.

ay naku, probably, tiring myself is perhaps what i just long for to validate my worthless existence and transform it into something that can be 'repaired'. see, this day has been hell compared to my other petix days. i spent the whole morning on call center floors listening to live calls and a session and a half of training the agents. and i noticed that i developed this habit common to all who wear glasses. to make a point or when the explanation becomes too lengthy, i tend to remove and wear back my glasses. welcome me to the club, people.

then i finished what was supposed to be the minutes of yesterday's meeting, worked on a few cases, extended an extra hand to this nice but makulit client, finished my spanish homework and battled the traffic to leon guinto. este dia esta ocupado pero no me estoy quejando. naks.

to cap this day, i went with jayvee to this small cafe near instituto cervantes and spent an hour talking about things that are regular but complicated. it was a pretty good banter but what stuck to me most was how i want to go on a cruise so much. jayvee works in a cruise ship and his stories made me think how unfair it is that i cannot afford trips like that. bwahahaha. for all i know, jayvee was in the same cruise ship that my sister and her family took a couple of months ago. ah basta, gusto ko na rin mag-cruise. bwahahahaha.

and before i forget, naastigan ako sa service ko from global city to the office. in the morning, we rode this regular shuttle as it was rod and i who's going there. they are to stay till 3 pm so it was only me who's leaving come 12 noon. as i was waiting for this familiar shuttle, this vintage ford stopped in front of me and gee, it was my service! wala namang extraordinary pero grabe, ang kuuuuul! feeling ko rich ako kahit from global city to roxas boulevard lang. ahahahahaha!!!! why not?!

and i am meeting my highschool barkada tomorrow! soy emocionada. i wish complete naman kami bukas pero i have not heard from lizette. hoy lizette, i last saw you ata eh 1999 pa! text messages are not enough ano ba?! and tzai of's her treat, whether she likes it or not. bwahahahaha!!! i was thinking of pepato for dessert pero baka mamulubi tayo. pero minsan lang tayo magkita mga etucap!!!! it's nice to find time to reconnect with people who have been so much a part of you. etong mga taong ito yung nagkukuwento ng mga stories na nasa "embarrassing and worthy to be forgotten actions vault" mo nung highschool. at most of all, mababait yan kasi manlilibre. waheehuuu!!! si lyndsey lang naman ang nagbabasa ng blog ko sa kanilang lima!!

but before that i still have to drop by instituto to get my textbook copy from marie and to prove to jose that i am a worthy speaker for the quijote event. heehee. i will get two pages pero he's kinda convincing me to share it "with a friend". senor, please have faith in me. i can do it. with the midnight paella and churros motivation, how can i go wrong?

Thursday, March 10

Hay naku. Ako, wala talaga akong contentment sa buhay. Laging may complaint. To think hindi naman siguro ganun ka-valid yung mga pinoproblema ko. Yung feeling ba na confused ka pero hindi naman. Iniisip ko lang kasing confused ako. Hmph.

Basta nakalutang lang siguro ako ngayon. Yung parang araw araw, ganun lang. Yung tipo ng employee na "What, it's only 3 o'clock?" kesa sa "What, it's already 3 o'clock?". May malaking difference nga naman. Pag tinanong ako kung masaya ba ako o kung ano ang gusto kong gawin, wala akong maisasagot na concrete. Clueless din, kumbaga. Basta yung feeling nga lang na nakalutang. This is no attempt to any form of self-deprecation pero eto lang ang kaya kong isagot sa mga tanong na ganun.

Sabi nila, dapat daw iibahin mo ang perspective ko sa buhay. Focus. Yung mga "Love yourself" crap na hindi ko malaman kung pano ba gawin kasi feeling ko mahal ko naman ang sarili ko. Tipong, I buy whatever I want kung kaya din lang ng aking meager salary. Ako nasusunod kung san ako kakain o kung uuwi na ba ako o ano gagawin ko pagdating ng house. Di ba mahal mo na sarili mo pag ganun?

Hay naku, I can't afford to do this long enough.


Ang tag-board, two days na ring down. Kaya nga ako mag-switch from doodle board eh. Ano ba naman.

Akala dito sa office talagang head over heels in love ako kay Mar Roxas. Bwahahahaha! Konti lang. Hehe. Pero iba talaga nagmamay-ari ng puso ko. Weehee. Three letters din yung nickname nya. Wahu, how's that for a give away?

Tuesday, March 8

Thank you, God

For giving my Mom yet another year of life. For easing her stress upon learning that she's healthy for her age. For answering her prayers; last I heard, she's very contented. Most importantly, thank you because twenty three years ago, you chose her to be my mother. I would not have wanted it otherwise.

Saturday, March 5


in-co-her-ent ( P ) (nk-hirnt) adj.

1. Lacking cohesion, connection, or harmony; not coherent

2. Unable to think or express one's thoughts in a clear or orderly manner

I spent practically the whole day watching DVDs. I got a load of Spongebob and his gang. I'm still catching up on most films; I finished just today Laws of Attraction. While I adore Julianne Moore, I found her overacting on some parts of the film but Pierce Brosnan was just dashing. I replayed it though. At this point in my life, I can use sloppy romantic scenes, too. Julianne's character, Audrey woods, said "Almost 80% of people who say that they don't want to get in a relationship are actually lonely". So I thought, am I saying that I do not need a relationship or am I lonely? Uhm, well, they mean the same if you take the quote in context. Hmm, let's just change the topic. Remember, I'm supposed to be incoherent.

My level 1 Spanish class officially started yesterday afternoon. I so like my classmates, they're so nice. Even Felipe, our instructor was quite scary but sweet. I guess it's brought by not being inside a classroom for about two years. I got startled everytime SeƱor Felipe called me for recitation; it's either Wendell or me who got to recite first because were at the ends of the horseshoe desk set-up (and oh, how I miss Dr. Sarile). I was impressed by my clasmsates and it will only be Marie, the Instituto's secretary and I, who will be left here in the country after the course. Most of them need the course to prepare them for their careers abroad. When asked, I just said I simply want to learn a new language (and that I completed six units of it in college but I virtually forgot everything I learned as I was always late in class then...but of course I didn't bother to mention that).

Student: Me llamo (insert name).

Instructor: Hmm...German?

Student: No, Ilonggo.


I heard a revival of Now That You're Gone, used in this new Koreanovela in Channel 2. I don't know if it was originally a Sharon Cuneta song but I remember her version of it and that's the only song of her that I liked. I like her other songs but I don't really like her singing, you know. But that one, I remember singing since I was about 8 or 9 and never getting it right as the notes are really high for me (I simply don't sing well, that's what I'm trying to say). So this version of Ella May Saison...errr..let's just say I like Sharon's version more.

I finally watched Super Size Me. It was interesting and while I found Morgan concept cool, we basically become what we eat. So loosen up.

I joined. I hope I won't chicken out. Come April 21, there will a non-stop reading of Don Quixote, in Spanish, at Instituto Cervantes. A thousand plus pages of the classic, and 400 speakers/readers are needed. I plan to sign up for one slot; it will only take 6 minutes per speaker/reader, which is roughly about 3-4 pages, depending on your reading speed and style. It will be fun. And historic. And fun. If you're interested, go contact them.

I got my gift for my Mom for her birthday on Tuesday. I deem it better than a special dinner, a truck load of her favorite chocolate, even a DVD of her favorite movie. While I am not wishing that she use it often, it helps to be armed with something like that. Any guesses?

Relationships need verbs.

I love getting in touch with my long-lost friends.

You will not win against a dumb person. You will not win against an insane man.

I am hungry.

Thursday, March 3


You Belong in the USA

People either love you or hate you
And you really don't care what anyone thinks
Big and bold, you do things your way

Kinda inaccurate pero for loyalty alone, sige na nga.

Wednesday, March 2


1. Today has been semi-hell. I left my eyeglasses at home, leaving me tearing the whole morning. I am officially dependent on my Jessica Zafra look.

2. Textfriend One. Aide. Mature political viewpoints at work.

3. Textfriend Two. Staff. Creative media aspect and some teeny weeny inside stories enhanced.

4. Semi-textfriend. Other staff. Nice.

5. Licette. I so miss this girl! She now works for a publishing house and I am dying to see her soon!!! So nice to hear from her. Super barkada ko 'yan. *sigh*

6. Interesting people from a language class that I hope would not be a "should have been". Please.

7. Our whole house repainted. Mess, mess, mess.

Tuesday, March 1

It suddenly dawned on me that...






hay naku, magpopost na lang ako ng mga litrato. dati pa 'to.

during my training in DC. there's rubi, me, bengt and ines

there's also nashwa, angelino, pa-cute me, maria, althea and rola

then there's ingrid, eva, khaing, annabella and lorena. quite far behind is the beautiful fernanda.

i sincerely never thought that i was the youngest in our class. i thought it's either nashwa or eva. what do you know, eva pala just looks like she got out of highschool, but wow, not only is she in her late twenties, she also left behind her 7-month old baby just to attend the training.

rachel, fatima and me. they are two of the four people who got really really close to me during the training. the other two are rubi and khaing, ang kasama kong nag-ikot ng museums after ng training, wahu.

camwhoring sa dulles international airport, where i saw the most handsome immigration officer ever. heehee.

name tag ko. at obvious naman kung anong print out ang pinagkakaabalahan ko sa halip na mga training modules.

morning at the foreign service institute two days after the snowstorm. brr.

let it snow, let it snow, let it snow...hindi pala tlaga appealing tignan ang taong may dandruff

pretending to be a "wright sister". one of my more decent pics inside the national air and space museum. nakakatawa yung iba at puro kalokohang angles lang kaya wag na. :)

me and my niece lai during our san francisco bay area cruise. she's a cruise coordinator kasi kaya...hmm..the perks! the perks! magkamukha kami 'no?

me, lai and the golden gate bridge. yun lang pala yun, ahaha.

this was in sacramento. look at my protruding horns...goes to show na ang evil ay giniginaw din, ha-ha! ang smile ko jan super fake na. wala na akong nafifeel nyan eh. hehe.

the first time i carried in my arms (bah, drama) my godson josh. "where are the bears?"

saka na lang yung iba. :)